Bullet In Her Heart.

Sincerely, Ridiculous Me.

2011-08-22T03:55:00.001+08:00

I'm sick and tired of feeling like a fool.

Constantly waiting for texts, for some care.

#fuckit

Hate being so darn stupid.

I have less than 3 hours to sleep, fucking pissed mode.

2011-08-02T21:34:00.007+08:00

Met up with HSS Netballers on monday for a game with Safsa, and it was great.
Turns out that the team's dynamics are still there, just lacking in stamina.
Nevertheless, we had fun, and we were pretty awesome.

FYP(I)'s finally done, thank god for the rather successful presentation on Saturday.

2011-07-14T00:26:00.001+08:00

"I've seen dreams that move the mountains" - Kutless.
IMYBGCZ.

2011-07-08T02:22:00.001+08:00

Every little thing is going to piss me off damn badly;
I'll just snap.

2011-06-19T00:39:00.003+08:00

"I never fail to see how great you look."
You're hot.

2011-06-15T03:11:00.005+08:00

Been so busy I couldn't remember where my holidays went.
Now that FYP practicals have ended, UT starts. #damn.

I FINISHED MY ONLINE LOGS!
and I'm now doing L.O.G.B.O.O.K, but I swear it's a killer.
*I'm Distracted*

THE DAY!
-Meet faci,
- UT workshop,
- Home,
- Dinner,
- Sleep,
- Online Log
- Logbook

"Suppose I call you up tonight and told you that I love you"

2011-06-06T23:50:00.000+08:00

I don't even get to talk to you now. Haha.

2011-05-15T23:42:00.008+08:00

Another stayover from Love(:

Dear love's stayover yesterday(:
Okay, I looked amazingly ugly here but I think B looks great!

TOMORROW: I'm gonna

Go to school,
Go back home,
Finish my work,
Go for 7km run(?),
Shower,
Fill in my online log.

And then maybe study.
I'LL BE HARDWORKING, I PROMISE.

THANK YOU PONGPONG!

2011-05-07T17:12:00.002+08:00

I just wanna fucking go out with you.

2011-04-18T00:47:00.003+08:00

Oh yeah, It's on baby...here we go now.

Wow, all these for B. Remember? Its now alll in the black box (: hee. So many cards, really. I'm shocked too.

Hey Boyfriend, do use this opportunity to try and pull up your GPA and work hard for school okay? Don't keep sleeping and sleeping. Also, use this opportunity to work more if you want to (: I won't stop you. BUT, must have some time to meet me (which I hope/think I'd have) Well urm, just work hard okay love? I know you can, and you know you can. By the way, you look great, always. Love, Girlfriend.

EVERYTHING FOR SCHOOL. I'm ready!

PENCIL CASE - ebay (B) ORGANISER - muji (E)

DENIM SHOE - barefoot (B)

HEEHEE, thanks!

I hope i'm ready for school.

But i'm kinda dreading it.

I know I have to work hard.

I think I will be very busy.

Good Luck Elaine. (:

kgoodnightbye.

2011-04-14T23:21:00.005+08:00

Set a date: Anytime, I'm going tanning with B again.

Set another date: Next holiday, I'm going rollerskating with B. Though I don't know how, but I wanna have some fun.

School's starting soon, in like 4 more days. Devastating.

2011-04-13T00:31:00.005+08:00

FUCK MAN. I totally have prata face and a potato head, I admit. Look at that HUGE slab. I NEED TO GO KOREA FOR PLASTIC SURGERY. :(

WAH O.O

MY BIRTHDAY CARD. 99% handmade, the other 1% comes from the material. haha. other than that, ALL handmade. :D NICE NICE?????????? You'd better say yes. (: xoxo.

Okay, Rio was nice. (:

2011-04-11T19:04:00.002+08:00

19th Birthday Celebration (: And a bird flew passed and shit on my sleeve! and some dropped onto B's feet and slipper. AHAHAHAHA, he always kena. Let me repeat, HE ALWAYS.

SENTOSA. Tanning, flips, walking in the rain with love (:

2011-03-26T01:39:00.004+08:00

We all know that Change is inevitable,
but we still couldn't handle it when it knocks on the door.
Why? Because it's always more than what you expect.

EXCUSE ME, MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING QUITE SOON.
Celebrate for me, buy presents for me okay, e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e????? :D
Thank you very much!

2011-03-19T23:37:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY (yesterday) BUNBUN!
wah, you sho handsome!

2011-03-14T01:57:00.003+08:00

New Picture, Bahaha!

I really have teddy bear nose.

I LOVE BOYFRIEND!
HI BOYFRIEND!

I'm a paranoid kid.

Because I'm so afraid I'd die from natural disaster right now.
I'm too young to die.

So pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

2011-03-10T20:48:00.003+08:00

It must have been something I did to get ignored.

Deserve it.

All you surrounded in fallacies,
it's time to snap back into reality.

2011-03-10T00:06:00.001+08:00

IMYB.

2011-03-08T22:55:00.001+08:00

" Hello Boyfriend!
I Love You! "

Hahaha, cute or what?

2011-03-01T23:56:00.002+08:00

Anywhere you are, I am near

Anywhere you go, I'll be there

Anytime you whisper my name, you'll see

How every single promise I keep

Cuz what kind of guy would I be

If I was to leave when you need me most

What are words

If you really don't mean them when you say them

What are words ff they're only for good times then they don't

When it's love yeah, you say them out loud those words, they never go away

They live on, even when we're gone

And I know an angel was sent just for me

and I know I'm meant to be where I am

And I'm gonna be standing right beside her tonight

I'm gonna be by your side I would never leave when she needs me most

What are words ff you really don't mean them when you say them

What are words if they're only for good times then they don't

When it's loveyeah, you say them out loud those words, they never go away

They live on, even when we're gone

Anywhere you are, I am near

Anywhere you go, I'll be there

And I'm gonna be here forever more

Every single promise I keep

Cuz what kind of guy would I be

If I was to leave when you need me most

I'm forever keeping my angel close

- Chris Medina (What Are Words)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQY4dIxY1H4&playnext=1&list=PL6E01C4EF7BD6FA51
Awesome song!

ENJOY.

2011-02-28T01:36:00.000+08:00

Breakdown.

2011-02-25T00:02:00.005+08:00

Maybe I ain't as important as I thought I am; Insignificant.

_________________________________________________________

Daddy love,

I hope and pray you're doing well and having a smooth recovery.
You may wake up tomorrow morning feeling pain and discomfort here and there but please be strong.
You know I love you and I know you do too.
As much as I don't usually and constantly express my care and concern, I just want you to know that I love you extremely much.
Seeing you there with all the tubes and machines pained my heart, as I've never thought that I would see you in that state.

I Love You Daddy Love,
Stay strong.

2011-02-23T02:03:00.001+08:00

It was nice knowing that I'm the first thing on your mind.

Thank you babe for showing me that.
I Love You.

2011-02-20T00:30:00.001+08:00

Worst girlfriend.

2011-02-15T01:17:00.002+08:00

Don't do this.

Life suck pretty much.

I can't stop but to keep blaming myself right now.

TOTAL BITCH.

2011-02-13T03:13:00.002+08:00

Overloaded Brain.

Exhausted Body.
Panda Eyes.

Hurting Ankle.

Injured Wrist.

Chest Pains.

Gastric.

I'mma Problematic Kid.

2011-02-12T01:33:00.001+08:00

It keeps bothering me, it's revolving around me right now.

I can't seem to concentrate on studying. SIGH.

Stress, I need to vent.

2011-02-11T23:01:00.001+08:00

What am I to do now?

Come, tell me straight in my face "you're a fucktard", I'll reply with a smile.

And I thought it was gonna be better, but no, it got worse.

Fuck moderations, fuck my life.

2011-02-09T01:51:00.003+08:00

Sometimes it only says that much when it keeps rolling down your cheeks.

Sometimes you come to a realization that youve became so silly because of a person and so dependent on a person that even when you told yourself that many times to stop being useless, couldn't even pull you out from it.

How many times you told yourself and force yourself to do certain things apparently it didn't work, and it just tells you one thing.

Sometimes that mountain youve been climbing is just a grain of sand,

so look back and have a great laugh on why this grain is taking it's toll on you.
Sometimes you say its a perfect mistake, but then again, there is no mistake that is perfect.

I love you more than you'll ever know, bun.
kgoodnightbye.

2011-02-06T22:52:00.002+08:00

Now that CNY's over, it's time for UT3, be persistent Elaine.

I need company <需要人陪>, sissy, mummy and daddy leave me in Singapore and have fun in JAPAN :'(
I don't get to go because I have school concerns and exams, dread.
THEY DIDN'T EVEN CALL OR TEXT ME! :(

I need to be really motivated to study, but how? Suggestions?

I now have the same profile picture as bun, I hope he doesn't mind. I really really like the photo, in fact, I love it; because we looked really great together! (:
I can't stop looking at it.
I love Bun.

2011-02-03T02:20:00.005+08:00

I'M A BITCH

Shoulder's really killing me, it's damn painful and it cramped with every little action.
Super exhausted from everything, I feel like disconnecting with the world for awhile; but cannot!

And
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE.

2011-01-31T00:04:00.002+08:00

Exams are in 15 days!

HOW NOW?! I've yet to study!

OH-MY-GAWD.

*panic*

AIMING FOR B+ B+ B+ A
Okay, yes! I CAN DO IT!

2011-01-30T03:22:00.003+08:00

Credits: Forever21 shoes.

HEY, I LIKE IT. It's cuteeeeee, and if i wear it at home, it'll keep my feet warm! :D

Going shopping on monday, oh, I really need to. So many things to get, clothes, bags, heels, accessories, EVERYTHING.

NEED. TO. SHOP!
NEED. TO. SHOP!
NEED. TO. SHOP!
NEED. TO. SHOP!
NEED. TO. SHOP!

NEED. TO. SHOP!

I hope school ends early on monday, so that I can go shopping.

I'm so broke know, how now?!

Cannot take money from daddy. :(

ZHEN ME BAN NE? *think*

2011-01-29T02:39:00.001+08:00

I. NEED. TO. GO. SHOPPING. FOR. CNY. CLOTHES :(
But I'm broke :(

I lost my iphone charger plug. :(
Life sucks.

2011-01-27T11:48:00.000+08:00

Enthusiasms.

2011-01-22T02:58:00.006+08:00

Err..okay, I'm offended.

I kinda miss these. Where I really sit down and study really hard. What happened now?

I'm UPSET. :(
and, LOOK AT ME IN SPECS :B heeeeeeeeee.
Kinda miss the days in sec school, with uniforms and no one really care how you look.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROOOOMIE!

I LOVE YOU!

:D
*Digs nose*

2011-01-20T23:58:00.003+08:00

MEGA. ANGSTY. PANTIES. NOW.

2011-01-16T01:17:00.007+08:00

I was never this afraid.

Even though it felt really good talking to you again.

It still feels like I'm not good enough for you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BONG.

I LOVE YOU, WE LOVE YOU.

2011-01-15T00:59:00.011+08:00

What can I say?
It ripped me inside out.
It shot me straight down.

I hope something happen to me so you might reply me.
It's silly, I know. But all girls do silly things right?
Yes.
I'm a total bitch, a total fucked up, I know.
Thank you for reminding me, it woke me up with a slap to my face.

I Love You.

2011-01-14T00:11:00.000+08:00

Feels Gapped.

2011-01-13T01:08:00.002+08:00

1 week gone, overly exhausted.

Another week to go.

Angsty.

2011-01-03T12:43:00.003+08:00

I miss my cousins very much, I haven't been updating them, and neither have they been updating me.

I WANT CHINESE NEW YEAR NOW, so.....I'LL GET TO HAVE LONG CHATS WITH THEM.

2011-01-01T06:52:00.003+08:00

Baby looks drunk here... hahahaha

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Went attica to club just now, it was..........................alright. not liking it alot though.
but yea, was some experience..
Didnt get to spend it with baby this year again, :( hopefully next year?

I miss baby so much but I won't get to see him till the coming tuesday.
and guess what, SCHOOL'S STARTING ON MONDAY, FML.

HATE SCHOOL.

2010-12-31T02:56:00.003+08:00

There're a couple of things to be updated...
1) Christmas party at Sche's
2) Christmas party at B's
3) Surprise trip to zoo for B
4) B's stayover and movie date

Sche's party.

Merry Christmas B.

Surpriseeeee.

Meet the Parents, Little Fockers.

I miss you, Ging.

Today is the last day of Year 2010, what a fast year ain't it?
It has been alright for the year, ups and downs for the year as usual.
The great ones have been real awesome, the bad ones.....just bad.

So I guess my resolution for the coming year is to hope that
I won't ditch school and work, because I hate both so much, so mates, be nice?

And that to have a great family and awesome time with B too, adding on,
for my family to like him and his to like me.

HAVE A GREAT YEAR EVERYONE!

2010-12-27T03:27:00.002+08:00

NOCTURNAL.

I have no qualms about it, but at least show me the effort.
It's time to step out of your comfort zone.

"Smiling is my favourite, you make me smile, and that makes you my favourite." - elf

2010-12-25T03:19:00.004+08:00

It felt different without you being here with me, beside me.
Not getting to say goodnight to you personally and a kiss on your forehead.
But anyway,

MERRY CHRISTMAS EARTHLINGS!

(to those that still reads my blog)

Though my christmas spent was alright..wasn't exceptionally fun and awesome posum, but it was alright..
The house is so quiet that you can even hear it when a fly, fly pass to celebrate their christmas. haha.

kbye.

2010-12-20T02:22:00.004+08:00

I rewatched the movie "UP" and I almost cried, because the love from old Carl was so strong towards his wife.
HAHA, how silly of me..

I can post anything on my blog, because no one reads them anymore I guess, except me.
haha.

I Miss My Boyfriend.

2010-12-19T01:21:00.002+08:00

And I miss you so much, even when I'm seeing you.
IT'S THAT DEEP, yknow?

2010-12-17T15:05:00.002+08:00

Holiday, Christmas, 16th, New year.
All the happy things.

NEED.TO.WORK.
Because am getting xmas presents for people, but i'm broke. :/
Gotten a longchamp bag from B's mummy: shocked, but thank you auntie!

kbye, I'm going to the toilet now.

2010-12-05T22:05:00.002+08:00

It's been so long since I last really felt happy, it's more of like a happy but not exactly genuine. I don't know how I should explain it. but yea, I've been unhappy most of the time.
I think I'm having some serious depression issue.
I kept myself occupied so I won't think, but when the night falls as I lay down on my bed, I realize it has never left, I just push it down more.

School week again, sucks.
Training or no training?

2010-11-28T02:28:00.003+08:00

If only every smile that people was this genuine...

I knew I was feeling lonely, because I didn't feel like how I felt.
I know I'm not me anymore, because I knew I've changed because of you people out there; hypocrites, ungratefuls. So don't come knocking on my screen, whining.
Whine trips don't work on me.
I tried once, I tried twice, if it's not working then that's it.
kthxbye.

I stay in the shower longer because it's too cold outside.
"You know someone mean alot to you when their mood can affect yours"

2010-11-25T01:05:00.002+08:00

C.

And life's been really depressing, it hasn't been smooth lately. Serious issue.
1) Dreading School (more like HATE school)
2) Constant Lateness.
3) Majority B grades.
4) Confined.
5) Gotten a damn C grade.
6) Netball (well, it doesn't really bother me now)

It's been really upsetting for me.
Stressing up.
The only thing that's keeping me sane is.....

2010-11-22T21:34:00.001+08:00

And I gotta say that I've been very stressed up lately.

I'm practically not sane.

2010-11-16T23:52:00.005+08:00

Have this locked in your mind, don't let it escape.

Nur Afiqah Malek

Decisions you made to you think that it's the right choice, to you think that it'll make you happy, go ahead. Push aside for the time being what others claim is foolish and wasting time.
; Follow the heart for this while.
It would be okay if one day you look back and laugh at yourself for being foolish at that while, because you believed what you believe and you did what you feel was best for you.
No one knows best, like the way you do, trust yourself and stay strong. Prove to everyone else including him that your choice is right and to him that he's worth the wait, and you're worth everything else.
; At the end of the day, it points down to your happiness.
Blame no one for their comments and advices for they all yearn to see was your cheerful and smiley self once again.
We're all waiting.
♥
I Love You Babe!

________________________________________

Nur Nadhirah Rashid

You're out there without the few of us around you, you might not find it weird, but we do.
I havent been hearing from you since ever and you might have forgotten how supportive and listening, I will be towards you. Think again, think back to then where we share the sorrows and laughter with the rest, or be it just you and me.
; Let it play on your mind like a movie scene.
Hearing that you're not doing so well outside, is just pure worrying. Because I don't know how well you're coping with it and I don't know how bad the situation is.
I wish to hear from you soon, and I had never forgotten you, so don't you forget me okay?
You were and still is that one part of my life, one good friend that I made in school apart for the 3 of them.
; I found you camping in my heart.
And yes, I'm still waiting for the day by which we get to hang out again, where I will get to see you, to hug you and nonsense around with you again.
Similarly, I hope you'd stay strong and prove to all that you are one precious girl.
♥
I Love You Babe!

_______________________________________

Jesslyn Cheng

Seen his true self, it'd be good. If he bothers, it's be good. But no, he didnt and that tells you something and you will have to figure it out yourself.
Take all the time that you need for recovery, because it will do you better in future, no matter how long or how short, your friends are always there.
; Time Speaks.
It might be hurting to finally come to a realization that he is no longer going to be there, or might not be yours, but think again.
If you'd have realise this too, that one day you will be able to find someone who will love you like the way you do, or more than you do, and treats you like a princess, like his everything.
When you look back next time, these are just stepping stones to make you stronger and steps that helps you to find who you'll find.
; Treasure Hunt.
To not think about it is not exactly a solution, understand it, realise it, accept it.
If you're happy, we're happy. Even if it's gonna be someone that we don't like, as long as you're comfortable and happy with it, we'll support you.
♥
I Love You Babe!

________________________________________

Zesline Chua

Pushing things aside doesn't mean you have forgotten about it. Because when the night turns in, you'll realise, every single thing that you've pushed aside comes knocking the door. And those things doesn't care how you feel.
; Sometimes you don't feel anything because you don't know what you're feeling.
You might thought that you have put it down at first, it might not be the case. It might just be that because you've left it hidden for so long that it numb you.
You may be caught in the rain someday but one day you'll have someone, by your side holding an umbrella for you, sheltering you from the rain.
; Protection.
If two people are meant to be, eventually they will find their way back, to the place where both of you belong.
It might take quite some time, but who cares right?
♥
I Love You Babe!

NOW.
This post applies to all 4 of you.
Regardless of which name I put under, even though I focus a little.
But, if one day you were to ever be in a relationship,
remember why you fall in love,
remember the feeling of your first date,
remember the feeling during your honeymoon period,
and listen to your heartbeat.
Because I feel that those are the things people tend to forget or it die off.
Don't know if you guys agree, but yea.

Lastly, remember, I'm here, Fiqqy's here, Naddy's here, Jess's here, Zessy's here.
All for one another.
Don't be shy, don't be silly, just approach us.
Anyone of us will be more than worried if we knew something happened but not sure what was it.
right?

Again,
I LOVE YOU GIRLS ♥
Stay Strong Cupcakes!

Yours Truly,
Elaine (:

2010-11-14T21:47:00.002+08:00

Okay.

And it became one of your everything.
I'm starting to share.

Now you got me praying every single second.

2010-11-07T21:05:00.003+08:00

And it always feels like it's the first time.

Hello Bunny.
You should stop making me worry.
Thanks, I Love You.

2010-11-01T00:57:00.000+08:00

And I really did...

Played the last quarter, and did well. (: thank god.
As well as spraining my ankle real badly.

THE ITCH IS KILLING ME! :(
goodnight!

2010-10-29T16:22:00.001+08:00

And I was hoping...

That I would get to play today, honestly.
Will that be fulfilled?

2010-10-24T21:16:00.001+08:00

And I feel like disappearing for awhile.

And I thought you would still text.
I check again and again, but I was wrong.

Bad mood.

2010-10-15T02:06:00.004+08:00

Broken radio...

Trembling with fear I do not know.

Clueless of what ever's gonna take place.

Guessing guilt is digging in.

With words and sentences repeating like a jammed up tape.

And an exhausted soul with a clear mind,

I knew it was gonna be a sleepless night.

But yet with all of so, I don't know why I had survived.

Perhaps people tend to forget the feeling they first fall in love.
Then they forget the feeling they first date.
Then they forget the feeling they were officially together.
And lastly, they forget the feeling of being in love.

Yes, it's like tap and water, because you keep giving and receiving.
But No, it's not like tap and water,
because you can't let it flow away and forget the reason why you switch it on.

And yes, it's just like a cup of tea with teabag.

At first it was nice and strong.

Then you add water, it thin down.

You continue adding water, eventually it's just gonna taste with water.

It has to always be at the initial; nice and strong.

If only relationship was easy, you wouldn't have problems "maintaing a relationship".

I ♥ You.

2010-10-07T20:26:00.002+08:00

Gingerbells #03.

Hi baby, if you're online, talk to me okay!
3 STRAIGHT DAYS. :(
I miss you bunny.

2010-10-07T02:21:00.000+08:00

Gingerbells #02.

Baby come back soon, I miss you.
I'm unhappy.

2010-10-06T00:31:00.004+08:00

Gingerbells #01.

I miss you.

2010-10-01T02:03:00.003+08:00

Remind me the times when we use to do this.

Take a look at this, when we're just kids, we do anything we want, we dare to try, we get creative, we get laughters and nonsense, and we treat everyone with heart.
But what happened now? We got more constrained, timid, less creative, laughters to hide your heartfelt, and sometimes even putting on a mask; hypocrite.
What a world of a difference.

Have been having the best of my time lately, well, at least right now, in this week.
But well, netball's still not getting back on track yet. Still not feeling it, or anywhere near.
I like talking to myself, and making myself feel happy nowadays.
I think self-talk's a really......effective way to clear mind up. (:

And yea, anyways, 29th was the thirteenth ♥.
(: guess what's my gift!
it's a whole jar of honeystars, sweeeeeeeet!

There there, I'm meeting love in the morning to go to the polyclinic for X-RAY! :/
Stupid wrist, hurting too badly.
I think the joint ball either shifted or popped up, well yea, shifted.
TSK.

2010-09-22T17:55:00.004+08:00

Realization is sometimes the greatest impact.

Bernard Ging Chang Zhen...

Listen to those raindrops tapping on the ground,
Listen to those swallows chripping like no other,
Listen to those heartbeats beating as one.

If it wasnt for you, heart wouldnt have pump this long, this strong.
If you mark this on your pages of life, you'd have realise.

2010-09-22T02:32:00.002+08:00

GroomBride.

Drink up, fall down, and we do it all again.

We kiss and we make up.

Hate work,

Hate netball,

Hate everything.

kthxbye.

2010-09-14T14:55:00.002+08:00

Remember me.

I Love You, this never change.
♥

Even if I'm gone, it'll never change.

2010-08-27T22:54:00.005+08:00

Full
Of
Shit
.

READ THE SIGN IN THE PICTURE.

Understand that?

Yes, good, and do it!

No, ask somebody, and do it!

I DON'T CARE.
and I don't care how rude I sound here.

THIS TIME ROUND, I'M GONNA GO!

And I didn't take action before informing pleaase.

And it has always been like that pleaase.

And I'm already 18 already pleaase.

And there's no democracy in the house pleaase.
KTHXBYE!

2010-08-19T11:08:00.001+08:00

To there of, it does not seem like I was.

Now I'm dancing by the silence,

Blinded by the tears.

2010-08-16T00:28:00.002+08:00

Everytime I look at you, it's like the first time.

HEADACHE'S BACK AGAIN, GREAT.

CAN'T SLEEEEEEEP.

2010-07-29T23:51:00.002+08:00

#11

LONELY, BORING

DAY.

Kbye,

takecare all.

2010-07-22T21:55:00.004+08:00

Why haven't you text?

I picked up my phone up every 5minutes to check for text.
I placed my phone beside me so I could reply once you text.
I picked up my phone immediately once it rang, with a smile on my face for 2secs.
And I keep ending up with a disappointment. :(

I don't dare to text you, don't wanna distract you.
I didn't text you, because I know you won't really reply- you're really busy.
I don't wanna spam your phone.
I don't wanna say "I Miss You" because I know you'll feel guilty.

I'll be good, and be patient.
♥
You'd better remember this,
I'M ALWAYS HERE WHEN YOU NEED ME. ♥

2010-07-18T17:57:00.004+08:00

Slow down, take a deep breath.

It's not there anymore, lost.
We ought to survive through this together, but it seems like we've all separated into 3 different groups.
Well, in short, it just ain't the same anymore.
Yeah, I'll live with this fact, if it gets better then it's great.
If it doesn't, then goodluck mates. (:

I'M STILL SICK!!! annoyingly irritating.
Yesterday's street wasn't really great, but oh well, we tried didn't we?? (:
but I'm aching badly, I only feel a overworked body.

Met B finally after so long again. (:
♥

Kbye.

" It is right to sit and watch this die, or slowly let it go,
but its better left alone"
- The story left untold.

2010-07-17T01:19:00.005+08:00

Factual Fabrications.

Let's play scrabble.
BAD YOU MISSING I'M.

See you sometime next week dear.

Training ain't smooth, I need to start thinking and focus.
School ain't smooth, I don't know what's wrong with my teammate.
Nose and throat ain't smooth, I need to recover, it's getting annoying.

The only smooth one is beep test, level 9.1 (: better than the last beep, but worse than my best.
oh well, kay, netballuxion's tomorrow, wish me luck and pray that I'll pray well.
It's another "training" session.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WONG KEKE! ♥
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIS-IN-LAW! ♥

Goodnight.

2010-07-11T23:27:00.007+08:00

Because you mean so much more than I used to know.

ONE DAY.
Every minute's like an hour,
Every hour's like a day,
Every day last forever.
But today, 4hours of waiting, feels like a day.

YOU'LL SEE.
Maybe one day, you try putting your right hand on your left chest, feel your heart, listen to it, and tell me your heart-felt.

ME SITTING.
It's been a week, fulfilled in a day.
But it seems like, I need to
see you more,
hear you more,
feel you more,
listen to your heartbeat more.

AT A.
I'm missing all the times when we met up,
times you sent me home,
times you woke up and met me on saturday for breakfast,
times you sat and watch me train,
times we chat on phone,
times we text,
times we webcam,
times we sing to each other till late nights.

CORNER WRITING.
I know that's not gonna happen for now at least, I'll wait patiently (:
For the original you to come back to me.
I won't stress you, I'll do my best to give you all the time and understanding you need.
Eventually, at the end of the day, I just wanna see the smile back on your face again.

A STORY.
When I see you, getting thinner, getting dark circles, getting so exhausted, getting so stress,
it pains me, yknow that?

OF US.
Every tear, is in exchange for every beat in me.
Baby, please takecare of yourself and don't fall sick kay??

Put em' together, it forms a sentence.
And, one day if I'm lost at the junction, I know you'll be able to find me.
That's how much trust I put in you.

I Love You ♥

" You won't be able to forget, you just have to learn to get use to it. "

2010-07-06T00:40:00.006+08:00

Do you see the wind?

UPSETTING.

And, WTF?!?!?!?

1) I got nagged for switching on 2 lights.

2) My mum wore my top and now it's loose! - long sleeve somemore.
ALWAYS LIKE THAT KNOW, I bet I'll question her! :/

UGH.

Baby, I Miss You Real Bad STILL.

2010-07-04T18:58:00.005+08:00

It takes one heart to tell you what I would say.

I'm not studying for my UTs still :/ hooooooooow!
And I'm not feeling well, tomorrow there's lab again..
Hate it when it's lab and training, because I have to bring a lot of things.

Feeling very vomitee now and I'm having a terrible headache :'(
Feeling really really uncomfortable right now, I swear.
:'(

And Baby, I Miss You Real Badly.
Can you be with me, like now, really? Impossible. :(

2010-06-29T22:57:00.002+08:00

All those shit mates, I don't like you.

You make me HATE SCHOOL because I HATE TEAMMING WITH YOU(s), because you don't help out in labs or ppts! FUCK OFF.
"Seniors" - "Juniors" - FUCK OFF.

A HUGE HUGE SAD SMILEY.
I don't like the way everything is right now.
:(

2010-06-27T22:19:00.009+08:00

Greatest Gratitude,

Love, you're most charming with the way you look at me when I lie down on your marshmallow tummy while you're sitting down.
♥

Love, you're most pissing off when you forgot to text me when you're home.
♥

Love, you're most adorable when you start to speak like me.
♥

Love, you're most disgusting when you burp right in my face.
♥

Love, you're most gentle when you stroke your hands through my hair.
♥

Love, you're most I-don't-know-what when you're being very very attitude towards your family and being very lazy.
♥

Love, you're most thoughtful when you taught me how to fight.
♥

Love, you're most scary when you throw me around out of nowhere.
♥

Love, you're most I-don't-know-what-again when you said "that's my girl!".
♥

Love, you're funniest when you can't stand me repeating what you said to me "yknow ah, when I see you open the door and closed it, seeing you so safe, the feeling is like wahh you're safe now"
♥

Love, you're the cutest when you pretend that you can take the tickles.
♥

Love, you're most natural and nonsense when you're with me.
(is that so?)
♥

Love, you're sweetest when you give me a tight hug and a peck on the forehead.
♥

Love, you're the loveliest person when you remain you.
♥

Hi Love,

Even though there are goods and bads here,
but who doesn't right?
Regardless of anything, I still love em'
and most importantly, I still love you! :D

This is just an advance message to you (:
I'M EGGCITEDDDDDDD, ARE YOU?!?!?!?!?!?
TUESDAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

I Love You Very Much.

2010-06-26T18:02:00.005+08:00

Piggyback.

I JUST PIGGYBACK BERNARD GING!!

From the changing room to the kitchen.

He's so fat, yknow!!

so heavy, his arms are like heavy already... oh my goodness.

BUT I'm so proud of myself.

but he scare till he perspire. hahahahahah.

2010-06-23T23:47:00.003+08:00

The look in your eyes.

I remember the time when we first spoke to each other.
When we started going out together in a group, till we started going out alone.
Chatting almost every night on msn.
Catching a movie together.
You treating me for a dinner.
You sending me back home, and popping the question.

So much have happened even before I even get together with you.
And much more when we're together..

Fights, tears, laughters, hugs and kisses.
Everything.
Guess what I'm seeing?

US.

2010-06-20T20:05:00.003+08:00

BAD MOOD.

Ran to river valley road today, then bus back.
Butt aches!!
I think I'm getting sick already, I keep having headache and feeling really uncomfortable for the past 2 days.

I just need a little bit more of support from you all.
I know I don't get enough sleep, I know I always reach home really late, I know you both worry that it'll affect my studies, I know you both are being concern about me.

But try to place some trust me in, that I can juggle between studies, netball and my boyfriend.
At least, act like you're supporting me in what I love doing.

2010-06-19T23:39:00.005+08:00

TWO HUNDRED AND EIGHTY NINE.

I finally get to spend some quality time with B after so long! (:
It's really awesome, hoping it will stay, and I know it will laaaaah, right right?
I guess you're sleeping tightly right now.
I Love You.

This week's like extremely draining, it got me so exhausted every single day for schoooooool :/
Monday - ENL last game, and I did well (: - slept at 1am plus
Tuesday - Anatomy UT, Meet B. - slept at 12am plus
Wednesday - GLITZ 2010 (pictures up on facebook) - slept at 1am plus
Thursday - Attempted to meet B :/ sorry. - slept at 10pm.
Friday - Training with 3km warm up, drills and selection round 1. - slept at 2am plus
Saturday - Meet B - sleeping at 12am plus.
Sunday - Gonna run.

I think I'm gonna crash too.
Buh-bye!

2010-06-17T13:43:00.003+08:00

I keep seeing you.

I dream of you.

Talking to me, meeting me, hugging me.

It feels so good.

But crashed when I woke up.

Sucks shit.

Kbye, school sucks.

2010-06-13T23:27:00.002+08:00

It's just like taking a step forward and backward at the same time.

Hello world, I'm finally back home. It feels good.
But sucks, I'm starting school tomorrow, ain't feeling it still.
Oh well, I'll continue working hard. (I hope)

GOODNIGHT WORLD.

2010-06-09T19:11:00.008+08:00

#1 It's been really nice hanging out with you again. (:

This holiday's just like all the other, it ain't feel like a holiday at all.

First week - Sports Club Camp (and yeah, shit happens) but overall it was pretty fun.
as well as super tiringgggg!!! :/
Everyday sleep like super late and wake up super early, feeling super cold.
Cramp together in the maggie-mee smell club room with things all around, and having to walk all the way from W1 to Sports Complex just to shower was a bother!
Don't forget the lyrics and Team cheer was a success, totally. Everyone's so hyped up, and it was so fuuuun!
The only thing was the Food Delivery during Amazing Race - Total screwed up.
But it's okay, we learn..

Second week - Netball Bonding Camp (and yeah, shit happens again) but it was resolved soon after and it's very fun, esp dragonboating (:
Beep test was full of shit for me, very disappointing.
Frisbee was funny.
Chanbara was extremely cool and interesting. (of course with Jesie Kaur, bringing on her actions)
Floorball this year was boring for me, because I became a full time goaley, HAHAH!
Touch Rugby? I think I can't play that!! TENDENCY TO PASS INFRONT, yknow.. netball...
Just pass infront only, like a confident. then became turnover :/ HAHAH.
Netball's still my love, but I think I'm losing my passion for it. or maybe, just losing the passion to run around.
Dragonboat's the hip! I bet all the girls would agree with me on that, despite that little conflict we had.
but it was super duper fun, even though it was super tiring, and my first team was screaming like mad! while the other team's like so calm.
Switched team, but we're still mad, because of Siti!
ahahahahahah.
Super fun, Super wet, Super tiring, Superb!
Sleeping was such a bitch because it was so warm!! like, perspiring yknow!?
and can't even get to sleeeep. :/

AND HOLIDAY'S OVER ALREADY?!??!?! Oh mansxzxzxzxzxzx.
Overdue: PP Final Report, Post Sports Camp Report, A&P study.
I need my sleeptime badly.
Gimme gimme more gimme more..

2010-05-30T23:16:00.002+08:00

Stay Just A Little While More.

Hey Love, Please takecare of yourself while I'm away these couple of days.
I'm sure I'll miss you damn badly :'(
Everything suddenly hit me so hard now. :(

I love you.

Be sure nothing will happen to you between these 3 to 4 days.
okay? If you do, you'll get it from me.
GET THAT?!

Goodbye Love,
I'll be careful and leave you a text every night (:
Remember my text to you.
I Love You, Sweet Love.

2010-05-28T19:06:00.001+08:00

YEAHHHH.

EXCITED FOR TOMORROW. (:

Unwell now though :/

2010-05-23T00:04:00.006+08:00

Oh god, this really sucks.

Been feeling real shitty lately, seriously.
I have no idea why the hell is so. - too much in mind? stress? fatigue?
Things doesn't seem to be going smooth as well :/

I'm not upset,
I'm not unhappy,
I'm not happy as well,
I'm not cheerful as well,
I'm just ....... I'm just ........
Moody?
:/

Do you feel the irony? that you don't even know what you're feeling..
I'm so very exhausted, with everything now.
Sick and Tired of it, no motivation.

I need a break. But it only comes in another week.. gees.. it's so long, 7 days.
needing to survive through the touturous days, use my brain, get up early, go for stupid-dreading trainings, feel lonely in class and during break, and of course feeling tired every single day but you just had to act like you're not.

I WANT MY HOLIDAYS,
THIS INSTANCE!

I'm so tired now, but I can't sleep.
HATE THIS FEELING.
felt it before??
The feeling is just like you can fall asleep then next second after you close your eyes..
but nooooooooooo, you didn't!
your eyes, body and all are so wiped out, except your mind.
it feels very working.. but you're not thinking of anything. but it just didn't shut down enough for you to fall asleep.
Anyone know why this is so? Please advice.

I love my blog, because nobody really read em'
Hee :D

I still love my boyfriend very much.

2010-05-21T12:24:00.003+08:00

Meet my new friend.

LONELY.
I swear it sucks badly.

The faci today's real fucked up, like seriously.

What I'm feeling: Depressed :S

2010-05-19T22:35:00.008+08:00

Look at how hypocrite you've become.

(I took this, Malacca)

I wanna leave everything that I'm doing now, Netball, Sports Club.
Sports Club, okay yeah.. High chance I'm really gonna leave.
But what about Netball?
Just take a look at the high committments, high exhaustion level, and ..........
I don't know why I couldn't leave. :/

And till now, it's 5 weeks since school started, BUT I'M STILL NOT FEELING IT.
Awesome shit. (Y)

So many things happened, good, bad, neutral.
Have I changed? in a good or bad way? can someone tell me?? pleasee (:
Have I become quieter? I feel that I did, I cut expressing myself already.
I BECOME GEEKIER AND LAZIER AND FATTER.

Someone tell me what to do can?
TSK!

___________________________________________________

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NADDY HON ♥

Love you so much,
Miss you so much.
Come come visit me in RP, or date me out and go on a date, just you, me and fiqqy.
I hope you're doing fine out there,
I hope you're loving the new environment.
Hearing that you're happy, I'm happy, we're happy (:
Even though we miss you like crazy.

Remember the time we went kbox?
Remember all the pour cold & hot water faces?
Remember all the camwhoring moments in class?
Remember how we bitch about ....... during chemistry?
Remember how we partied and jump during FOP day 3?
Remember how we always hug each other Hello and Goodbye?
Remember how the girls talk about guys in anger during breaks?
Remember the times, we go to cafe esplanade together during break?
Remember how we text each other, telling each other not to skip chem?
Remember how I used to complain to you and you lending me a listening ear?
Remember how we walked to interchange together and scolding each other (vulgarities) on the way?
I REMEMBER ALL.
Thank you Naddy love for the awesome 16 weeks and more spent.
I've known you for 16w + 8w + 5w = 29 weeks (:
With great love, elaine.

What I'm feeling: MOODY :s

2010-05-15T00:11:00.004+08:00

"I can't believe I finally found you baby..."

Sing to me all night long, like you used to. I miss that.

When I look at you.

The light that breaks the darkness.

Subset

2010-05-14T00:57:00.002+08:00

CRUSHED CONFIDENCE?

I may have already lost the chance of getting court time.

I've come to a realisation. haha (:

2010-05-12T23:15:00.004+08:00

I MISS YOU ♥

Hello Bernard, You're doing your work right now.

So I can't really talk to you :( don't wanna disturb you too.

But really miss you a lot.

♥

It's okay, you don't have to rush your work. Take it slow.

Knowing that you'll be supporting me all the way, is good enough (:

Thank you.

Thank you Stella for cheering me up (: and encouraging me!

For texting me the whole day, and nonsense around.

Of course, being my "fan", hahahaha!

And for the coming Cheesecake, heehee.

We really hit off very very well, (Y).

Dear Roomie, please cheer up.

I know you're a strong girl, and you know you are.

♥

Just take the first move, and try to solve everything okay?

And remember this, you don't have to wear a mask in front of me. (:

I wanna see you smiling soon, okay?

2010-05-09T23:24:00.004+08:00

TODAY IS A HAPPY DAY (:

Met B with his dinner and his Pink Dolphin at Vivo today (:
He's happy, I'm happy, his colleagues are not because they're jealous!
NEH NEH NI POO POO, hahahahahha.
and I'll get to see B again tomorrow! :D he's gonna accompany me to a game, I won't be playing.
hahahaha, ironic?
usually your boyfriend/girlfriend watch you play right? and not watch TOGETHER with you.
I know, it's funny.

But today's also a sad day :'(
went to nursing home to visit grandma.
she had a pipe inserted through her nose, to her stomach i think.
to feed her with milk. because she's too weak.
looking at her legs creep me, because it's so skeletal.
she kept sleeping, when she woke up, she looked so blur.
she used to speak so loudly. but now, you can hardly hear her, even when you placed your ear right beside her mouth. that's how soft it is.

I feel the boiling tears at the brim of my eyes each time I think back.
I feel bad whenever I look back on how I shouted at you, and showed temper.
I want you to call my name again.
I want you to hold my hand and feel my face again.
I want to see you smiling at me again.
I want you to wave at me. when I said "I'm leaving"

HOW IS TOMORROW LIKE?
I DON'T KNOW. Just watch I guess.
Yknow.. sometimes, you don't even get back half to what you've put in.
Really, and this sucks.
BAD.

I know B will be there, supporting me, and helping me get back up again.
You will right?

2010-05-06T19:07:00.008+08:00

GIVE ME A SLICE OF UNIQUELY CUT POTATO

Go play a round of Merry-Go-Round

2010-05-06T00:34:00.003+08:00

On the way home....

On the bus ride home, looking out the window.
I saw the usual road sign.
This road sign "<<<(BKE)PIE", makes me look at vehicles travelling that direction.
How I wish I was heading the same direction, to yours.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LULU! :D

kbye.

2010-05-04T23:21:00.001+08:00

IFs...

IT HURTS BUT...
Deserved it.

2010-05-02T13:56:00.005+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMSIE LOVE ♥

GET WELL SOON BERNARDGING ♥
You better takecare of yourself k!
drink more water
rest more
eat medicine
(:

Okay, next!
Had an advanced mother's day celebration at some Japanese restaurant.

our beloved granny, AH BA! (:
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

♥

AH BONG (:
♥

Family picture, without Bro :/

okay bye, study now.

ANOTHER 1 WEEK OF SCHOOL,
HATE IT TTM.

2010-04-29T14:46:00.002+08:00

It's been 240.

Happy 8th dearest Bernard Ging ♥
(: IRONMAN 2 WITH HIM LATER (:

AND, You.. Takecare k!!
RECOVER SOOOOOOOOOOOON :(
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

W14K- after our 16 weeks together.

Yuai, May, Ming Wei, Izwan, KF, Zes, Fiqah, Nad, Elaine

All those who turn up, thank all of you for making my day wonderful (:
MISS ALL THE LUNCH(s), NONSENSE AND EVERYTHING.
doubt I will get any of those now,
HATE SCHOOL :/ (lonely school days)

Hoped those that haven't been turning up for meets, come.

And NUR NADHIRAH RASHID, YOU BETTER WORK HARD AT YOUR NEW SCHOOL.
I WANNA MEET UP WITH YOU OFTEN K!

♥ W14K.

May, Nad, Fiqah, Zes

Goldfish face.

WORK HARD FOR ENL ELAINE!

YOU CAN DO IT.

(oh, how I used to love school. focus, it's USED TO)